I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
And then the night went full on bisexual.
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
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