I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
so the guy behind me in court for my DUI hearing got a DUI on a lawnmower at 1AM...he is my new hero
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
At chipotle, there's a bachelorette party starting out the night here, i'm going to let you imagine what the bride to be looks like
And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
Randomize
