we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions
So, apparently I made everyone omelets last night. Even when I'm drunk, I'm still a trophy wife.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
And then he peed in my hair
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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