Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
Randomize
