How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
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