Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
New scientific discovery: The hypothetical attractiveness of a woman increases exponentially as her skirt:boot ratio approaches zero. Nobel Prize in my future?
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize
