if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
