Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
Randomize
