I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
The sex was great until she started shouting, "Succeed!, Succeed!" Then it was like I was fucking a motivational speaker. Awkward.
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
Randomize
