We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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