so, totally just picked up a pack of red bull, and some magnum condoms and the old woman at the register's tone went from "hi blah how are you" to "oh....how YOU DOIN'?" she knew what was up
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
My liver just had a heart attack.
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
Ever walked into a basement full of 10 guys jerking it to a live stripper? Cause I have. Always confirm the address of a house party. Always.
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
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