so after all day drinking, we went to an all u can eat crab place and i was going from table to table surveying the crowd if they though the crab i was carrying around looked like the flying dog from never ending story...what the hell is wrong with me?
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
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