Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
i wish there were pregnant emoticons
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
They were out of watermelon smirnoff, so we got you a fifth of 5 o'clock and an actual watermelon.
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
Randomize
