their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
I just met his mom for the first time with a hang over. Then we went to watch his 8 year old cousin get baptized. Apparently his family loves me. I should drink more often.
Randomize
