somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
I know. he thinks we're 'meant to be'. No we're fucking not. God wouldn't give my soulmate a pencil dick.
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
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