Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
Randomize
