Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
Last night: Repeatedly yelled about how the fishbowl tasted like blue, stole a stranger's hat, hugged the DJ for playing my request, made out with my roommate, and abandoned the guy I dragged to the club in the first place
This morning: Hat doesn't fit, hangover headache is blue, and I can't move without getting lightheaded
Listen when they tell you not to drink after giving blood
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
Also there's so much vodka on my breath that if I blew on my fingers my nail polish would fall right off
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
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