dinner at cheesecake factory: $40. drinks at yard house: $50. having sex in the VG parking lot while people are staring at you awkwardly: priceless. Goodnight.
dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
Honestly I was sitting in managerial accounting thinking "I really need to get my shit together and stop drinking so much wine." But when you asked I realized... it's wine. It's always a yes.
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
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