dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
I'm sitting in front of the mirror eating cereal and pondering how my boobs got so big
Welcome to my life
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
Randomize
