He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
Just puked most of my soul out..
Randomize
