I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
I stumbled in at 6am to find my cat in the window making a noise I've never heard her make. When I went to the window there was a goat outside staring at us.
Are you sure? Or did you just think there was a goat?
No there was a goat. I gave it a donut.
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
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