Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
He left his umbrella behind in my bed to 'keep me company', then stole my front door key before he went to work
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
Randomize
