i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
It's 1 AM and there's a guy outside my house belting out Bennie and The Jets. He stops in between verses to puke. I'm joining him.
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
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