It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize
