i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
I swear to God, I saw my life flash between my legs.
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
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