i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
today i did the best job ever shaving. like my vagina is PERFECT. plus i straightened my hair for a good hour. if i don't get ass tonight, i'm killing a baby.
splinters make it hard to masturbate
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
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