Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
i should start naming my morning wood
great idea but wrong number
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
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