just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
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