I think scott just propositioned me for sex
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
He literally shoved the EMT, climbed in the back of the ambulance with his vodka and was like, "C'mon, people. Wrap this up. I got shit to do."
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
Randomize
