It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
I really don't understand how I cannot figure out how to work a fucking can opener when I'm hungover. Yet I still retained the ability to take a perfectly symmetrical picture of my erect penis and send it to every person in Matt's contacts the night before.
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
...I can smell the alcohol on your breath through that text
My Tinder date from last night is my Uber driver for tonight's Tinder date...neither of us said a word.
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
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