if i died would you start the facebook group?
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
Randomize
