the vacuum is drunk
what?
i spilled my drink and tried to vacuum it and now the vacuum is drunk
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
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