im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
Randomize
