we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
Tbell employee was shuffling through my bag, calling off each item i ordered to make sure it was all there. I stopped him halfway through with "guy, don't worry, I'm high as shit, I'll eat anything."
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize
