I'm really into asian looking animals
I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
Randomize
