You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
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