That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
My diabetic professor who apparently didn't eat anything all day keeps passing out. I gave him a joint. He's gonna be fine.
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
Randomize
