just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
Couch. On fire.
Randomize
