White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
Randomize
