I can't tonight. I'm still nursing a beach sex injury. Don't wanna talk about it.
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
Trouble in the neighborhood - turns out my brother's summer lawn care gig also entailed banging three different MILFs and they just all found out about each other
Gotta pay for college somehow...
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