If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
new low: my hungover self just mistook bacon grease for mashed potatoes. worst. mistake. ever.
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
Randomize
