She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
Randomize