I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
we had a ceremony where you passed your fake id onto me in the middle of the bar. i was on my knees and you presented it to me. i don't think the bartenders were suspicious though
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize
