mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
Another day, another engagement, another cat
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
