I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
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