1:32a: I quit. signing up for eharmony. Don't judge
Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
I fucked a guy named chris tucker last night
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
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