WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
My financial advisor pointed out that 37% of my income is currently going towards "non-essential food items"
That's banker lingo for "you're an alcoholic"
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
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