Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
Teaching my class, used paper clips to fix my hair. Too hungover to be a kindergarten teacher.
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
Randomize