I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
I need Jameson.
Yea? How do you think I feel? Your job during the delivery is to keep that flask ready. The moment our kid pops out, I'm taking a shot.
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
He casually compared computer science to childbirth and I was like "hey, as someone who has wanted to fuck you for six months now, could you please never talk about childbirth ever again"
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
Randomize
