When I told my mom I was having a rough time, she responded with "pop a xanax, take a nap, and when you wake up all will be right with the world." My mom is finally starting to shape up.
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
How external is "for external use only"?
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
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